I cannot dwell or live in the past in any way. It's one of the most detrimental things I can do for myself and the people I love here now. Especially if I have made an honest amends to the harmed party(ies). I've gotten better at accepting my humanness and learning to grow from my mistakes. Self-hate and shame don't do anyone any good. And living in those feelings is just another form of selfishness for me. I've learned to let the ghosts and skeletons from yesterday stay in their graves so I (and they) can find some peace today.